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Served up!

So today I decided to let the world in on my secret recipe for making the perfect cup of chino, or cappuccino in some parts of the world. Of course, it is important to mention that beverages are far more important to me than food. Give me a Dr. Pepper six-pack and I could survive three whole days without food, which is an obvious exaggeration and would not want you to take me seriously. But just to get the point across, I’m the kind of person who loves to mix things together when it comes to drinks. Nothing alcoholic, of course, the brain is a terrible thing to waste, as they say. Other than that, I would say that enjoying a drink, whether hot or cold, can probably be evolved into something of a hobby. It just is so much fun to imagine the taste you want to achieve and then bring all the ingredients together for the perfect murder! So, without further delay, here’s how I do my cup of Morning Breath (I know it sounds nasty, but it explains a lot!)

You get the cup ready. I know some of you may be terrified at this point, but washing your cup thoroughly especially at your work place is vital. See, each employee has a cup. But can you really guarantee that no one’s using your cup when you’re not looking? You’re probably asking who in the world would want to use someone else’s cup? Simple, the same person who doesn’t know that it’s your cup, since your pretty name isn’t written anywhere on the cup. So just rinse it well, yeah? Now for the second step:

Add the sugar. See, there’s a debate amongst us Beverage Lovers: any drink that requires sugar to make it drinkable is a drink not worth drinking. Whereas, as some would argue, coffee is aroma-based and therefore does not require sugar (hence it is worth drinking). That is a baseless and pointless accusation, in my defense of all sugar-based drinks! Tea is amazing without sugar, if you cook it right! Sugar is love, baby. The more sugar you add in your drink, the more love you get out of it. All that while keeping in mind that too much love can smother you, of course. But for me two table spoons of love is good enough to call it a drink!

Add two tea spoons of Nescafe. I tried using different coffee brands, this one works well for my taste buds. Like I said at the beginning, it’s all about how you imagine it to be! You can get yourself a packet of Cappuccino ready-made sachets, you’ll rip it, pour it, add water, stir it, and it’ll be ready. All within less than  a minute. But where’s the romance in doing that? Excuse me for saying this, but it’s exactly the difference between making love and…well….you know….the other thing. So going back to coffee, add more or less Nescafe depending on how strong or light you want your coffee to be.

Grind it. This is very important. Grinding the sugar and Nescafe together before adding the water is important in avoiding bad chunks of coffee floating around in the cup; and believe me, they’re hard to eliminate once they’re there. So grinding them together will result in the following:

A beautiful brown semi-powder that loves hot water. However, I would take this opportunity to apologize for the out-of-focus picture. I guess everyone wanted to help out in some way once they knew I was documenting this experience. And I had to accept the helping hand, really. So I made the coffee, they took the pictures. Still, I thank them and would appreciate their future help on similar blogs! Now, all you need is water. Just make sure the water is just as hot as the temperature outside and you’ll be fine!

This is an extremely important step. Only use a couple of drops of hot water, nothing more! I found this out after many failed and rather disappointing trials at wanting to achieve a rich, thick and creamy substance. Adding too much water will kill this goal for good; you cannot fix it once you’ve done that. So be very careful. Take a deep breath, hold the kettle steady, and watch where the water is just peeking out the nozzle, then slowly but surely drop a couple of drops, maybe three, onto the brown love powder. If you’ve done that successfully, then rejoice, you are moving on to the next level! If you failed, well..can’t help you..just do what you want with it…. loser….

This is what you want to see first. Mixing very little water with that love powder will give you a big chunk of love mud. This is good, you might be taken aback thinking that you’ve done something wrong, but no. This is what you want it to look like. Now keep mixing until your arm feels a little warm and numb, and behold the magic before you! The dark love mud turns into…

…Golden-creamy love mud! If you notice the time on the previous picture and this one, you’ll see that I kept stirring for two minutes. I normally take longer than that, since I love to spend time with the ingredients that change the way I feel about working in the morning. But since this is for educational purposes, I’m putting you on a fast-track to learn the trick from the master! Let me tell you something else about being creative. At this point and this far into making Morning Breath, I want you to realize that the world is between your hands now. I usually add four peaces of peanut, split in half, with the golden-creamy love mud for sensual and sensational flavor.  You can break some biscuits, or add some ginger, or throw in some lemon or coconut snow flakes. Just imagine what the flavor is, and work hard to get there. You won’t regret it.

Now, once you’re done mixing, add some hot water onto the love mud to make it a little more controllable. Go ahead and use two plate spoons of Coffee Mate to give yourself some insurance in case the coffee was too strong. And if it weren’t, heck it still tastes great! I found out, after hundreds of experiments, that one spoon will still give you a bitter after-taste. Three spoons will make it taste like a cup of coffee that’s suffering from amnesia, since you won’t be able to tell whether it’s coffee or just milk. So stick with two. Two spoons are just it! Now mix mix mix mix…

Again the focus issue. Very sorry. But forget that for a minute and focus your eyes on what you got now. A good mix is what you got, for sure. Now things are ready; you’ve passed the danger zone. The only trick now is altitude and distance, as explained in the following picture…

Altitude in the sense that you don’t want to pour water with the kettle so close to the cup. This won’t give you the soapy, bubbly, and funtastic texture of the drink! So be proud and hold your arm up high, aim well and pour it like it’s raining! Make it SPLASH religiously! Except, here’s the second part of the story, you need to keep your perfect distance from the cup as the splash will surely jump onto your precious clothes. If you’re like me, I usually use any of my colleagues as a shield. They mind of course, but it’s exactly why I don’t tell them to keep their distance. So just remember, altitude and distance. But hold on just a moment, jumpy! Don’t fill it up just yet, take your time to stir some more to make certain no rebellious chunks will appear at the end. Perfection is essential!

See the look of love on its face? Well, imagine the taste if peanuts were there or any other magical flavor! I usually draw a heart-shape in the cup as a ritual before I start sipping, but I’m simply showing you the white board, you gotta grab your marker and sketch away! At this stage, you’re done. Congratulations, you’ve made Morning Breath for a fresh start. Nine minutes to make, true. But nine minutes of love, baby. Where else would you get love so warm and cozy? Here’s to a fresh start…

Bon appetite! : )

  1. Perdy
    August 3, 2010 at 8:51 am

    Believe you me!!! When shmoo makes his coffee it really iiiis as though he is in loooooove! No one gets more attn than his coffee at that moment.

    To add as a comment, Id like to say that I love Petit Beurre biscuits with tea. They’re just right!! Not too sweet, or extravagant……. etc etc….. its the most simplest, ‘nice tea biscuits’ around. And when i say ‘simplest’, i mean biscuits in the category of ‘plain’, and ‘nice tea biscuits’ refers to the biscuits you would consider “good”.

  2. August 3, 2010 at 12:30 pm

    And thank you, Perdy, for the input! Actually, the love gets more intense when more people are watching it…. kinda kinky if you think about it…(sigh)

    As far as biscuits are concerned, I’m finding myself attracted to ginger biscuits these days. They’re obnoxious little freaks!!

  3. Bader
    August 5, 2010 at 8:22 am

    Im not a coffee person but I think I ‘ll give it a second thought 🙂

  4. August 5, 2010 at 1:05 pm

    Hey, Bader! Well I’m not big on coffee either, it’s why I never had a thing for Starbucks (shocking, I know!). But, you will love my cup of Morning Breath, especially now, since just today I discovered a new flavor… Marshmallow Morning Breath!! Yummy to the power of 10 🙂

    Thanks for the comment!

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